That's how long I got to be her Mumma.
I remember telling God that it wasn't enough, begging Him for more time with her.
Another Christmas because we spend her first one in hospital.
Her first birthday, her first steps.
But I knew that was unfair because the older she got the more she would miss me.
That broke my heart so I wanted her to move on soon so she wouldn't miss me.
So she wouldn't be too attached even though I knew it was too late, we were smitten from day one.
For so long I wasn't sure when my part was done, I just nervously trusted that I would know when it was.
It does not get easier to love with your entire self knowing that they will leave.
The call came and my heart dropped and I felt still nervous because i did not feel done yet.
I prayed that her new parents would love her like everyone around us had loves her, because everyone did.
Strangers stopped to comment on her.
I prayed they would take her to house and she would grow up knowing about how Jesus loved her and how he had a plan for her.
I prayed they would be perfect for her.
The second they met her I knew I was done, I knew I'd done my part and I knew they were her Mum and Dad.
Turns out that while we had been praying for them to know Jesus, they were praying the same thing about me.
Funny how Jesus works like that.
Funny how he answers before you ask.
Funny how even though it looks so small it's really so incredibly big.
1 percent is not a lot, but 1 percent matters. It makes a difference and it means something.
So the next time you are doing something insignificant.
Think about how He left the 99 for the 1.
Remember that you matter.
